3 Business Lessons I Learned the Hard Way

Chapter 8

Author

Ellyette Gheno
December 18, 2024

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Quick Recap Of What’s Inside

⚠️ 3 Business Lessons I Learned the Hard Way

🎁 Worth the hype

⚠️ 3 Business Lessons I Learned the Hard Way

Last week, we talked about navigating the unknown in business. The truth? You can’t fully prevent challenges—especially the ones you don’t see coming.

Here’s my advice: expose yourself to information, test ideas within safe boundaries, embrace failure where you can tolerate it, and get back up quickly. Growth thrives on curiosity—surround yourself with people who inspire you, listen to voices that challenge you, and dedicate at least 30 minutes a week to learning. If you don’t? Failure will teach you instead—and it doesn’t care if you’re ready.

I learned this the hard way. As a 23-year-old woman navigating the fundraising and VC world, I handed over my power far too quickly to people who looked more “qualified” on paper.

The fancy suits. The technical jargon. The impressive résumés. I let it get to me—I doubted myself and forgot that no amount of credentials could replace what I uniquely bring to the table.

The “it factor” isn’t something you can measure. It’s your energy, your creativity, your perspective—and it’s yours alone. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.

PSA: Sweetie, no one has it all figured out. No degree, no title, no amount of experience will save you from failure. We’re all just out here trying to figure it the f*** out. The “it factor” isn’t found in degrees or titles. It’s the unique energy, perspective, and creativity that only you can offer—something no one else can replicate.

1. Managing People is a Job, Not a Relationship

In my early leadership roles, I struggled with wanting to fit in rather than lead.

I blurred the lines between friendship and management, thinking kindness meant being everyone’s friend. But I learned that true leadership requires balance. Respect and clear communication will get you further than blending personal connection with authority.

✅ Actionable Tip: Allow space for feedback—both ways.
Send discussion points or questions in advance, and ask for input ahead of time. This gives you time to prepare mentally, respond thoughtfully, and lead with intention instead of reacting in the moment.

2. No One is Coming to Save You

Early success feels validating, like proof you’re on the right track. But depending on others to “fix it for you” is dangerous.

I learned the hard way that even well-intentioned advisors and investors have their own agendas. Their guidance can be valuable, but don’t mistake credentials or experience for ownership. Nobody will care about your business as much as you do.

✅ Actionable Tip: Build a network of professionals with diverse skill sets who have no skin in your game.
Include accountants, other founders, and experienced investors. Ask questions, gather their insights, and use those perspectives to make informed decisions—without giving away your power. If you don’t have this in your network, actively look out for people on LinkedIn, local entrepreneur groups, events, etc - find it!!

3. “It’s Just Business”

This phrase used to hit me like a gut punch. It felt cold, dismissive, and harsh. But I’ve learned this: it’s not personal.

Even good, trustworthy people will prioritize their own interests when the moment calls for it. Separating emotion from strategy is one of the hardest lessons, but also one of the most liberating.

You can lead with empathy, but you also have to know where your boundaries lie.

✅ Actionable Tip: Define your non-negotiables.
Write them down. Revisit them often. Refine them as you grow. These non-negotiables are your compass—never compromise them to serve someone else’s agenda.

Final Thoughts

These lessons weren’t just about business—they were about trust. Trusting myself to lead, to hold my power, and to stay grounded in what matters most.

Little Me, take note: You don’t need anyone’s permission to own your place at the table. Trust the process, trust the discomfort, and don’t let anyone dim your light.

Worth the hype

Share Your Thoughts: Have these insights sparked any thoughts or strategies of your own? Reply to this email or share on social media to keep the conversation going. Let’s connect on Instagram and TikTok.

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