Consistently Falling Out Of Consistency

Dear Little Me,

The only thing I’ve ever done consistently is fall out of consistency. I’ll build a routine, get into a rhythm, start to feel proud of myself — and then, it slips.

I used to take it personally. Like it meant something about who I was — or what who I couldn’t be.

Especially because I’ve always believed that consistency is what separates people who succeed from people who fail.

So when I fall off, I assume I’m the problem.

But I’ve been paying more attention lately. And what I’ve realized is that a lot of the “falling off” happens when I try to copy systems that don’t actually work for me.

I don’t do well with rigid plans. I get bored easily. And with ADHD, it’s not just about attention — it’s about pressure.

The second something starts feeling like I have to do it, I want out.

So I’ve started managing myself a little differently. Not with control — but with options.

Almost like forecasting. Planning for the version of me that might not want to do the thing, but still wants to stay in motion.

Instead of saying “I’ll wake up and go for a walk,” I give myself three options:

• Walk the dogs

• Watch the sunrise

• Read for ten minutes

Different paths. Same intention.

I still drift. But now, when I do, I don’t immediately go to shame.

I ask why. Not to make excuses — but to gather data. Sometimes it means I needed rest. Other times, something in the system broke.

So I take note.

• When did I feel most in flow?

• What was different that day?

• What version of structure actually helped me show up — without burning out?

That’s the thing about consistency no one talks about:

It’s not about doing the same thing every day.

It’s about designing options that lead to the same outcome.

It’s about noticing what works — and doing more of it.

It’s about paying attention to when you skip — and why — so you can get smarter, not smaller.

If there’s one thing I’d go back and tell you, it’s this:

You’re not bad at showing up.

You just haven’t figured out how you show up best.

Track that. Learn from it. Build around it.

Being consistent doesn’t mean never slipping.

It means coming back to yourself — again and again — it’s a work in progress. Just like you.

Sincerely,

Ellyette

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